Building and influence and persuasion

You will want to learn the skills of rapport building and influence and persuasion.
Be well,
Dwika-ExecuTrain


Tip #2 To Move From Technologist to Technical Manager

"What You Say versus How You Say It"
**STCerri

As technical professionals we have been educated, trained, and conditioned, that's right, conditioned, to believe that "the one with the most accurate data, wins". We are convinced that all we have to do is put forth the accurate and true data and it's the "end of the discussion". However, as we move into management and leadership, we find that something called "influence" and "persuasion" become more and more important.

In fact, many decisions made at the management and leadership levels are not based on black and white, cold hard, factual data. They are made on a mixture of data, judgement, emotion, human factors, and fuzzy expectations about the future. The equation for this type of decision might look like this:

Data +
Judgement +
Motivation (Emotion) +
Human Resources +
Fuzzy Expectations About the Future = Best Answer

Of the five parameters on the left side of the equal sign, only data and Human Resources (to some extent) have anything to do with facts. And "facts" is the only variable category that doesn't rely on persuasion or influence. Therefore, most of the variables involved in management and leadership decisions rely on influence and persuasion.

And influence and persuasion rely as much on "how you say something" as on "what you say".

Therefore, if you are going to be successful as a manager and leader you must get clear that how you say something is as important, and in some ways, more important than what you say. This means that you will want to learn the skills of rapport building and influence and persuasion.

Here is just a simple example of the difference in meaning based on "how you say something". In each sentence below, read the sentence out loud and emphasize the syllable I have made bold.

I didn't steal your wallet.

I didn't steal your wallet.

I didn't steal your wallet.

I didn't steal your wallet.

I didn't steal your wallet.

Notice that as you read each line out loud and emphasize each bold word, the meaning of the sentence changes. it's the same sentence and yet a different meaning for each sentence.

How aware are you of the "meanings" you convey in your everyday conversations with your colleagues based solely on your emphasis on certain words? How aware are you of the "meanings" your "create" in the mind of the listener? Do you think that the meanings others get from you are the same meanings that you have in your mind of what you said. As Morphius said to Neo in the first Matrix movie, when they were in the sparring program, "You think that's air your breathing now?" My statement to you is, "You think those who hear your message hear the same message you intend?" Hmm.

Be well,
Steven